Pro 29:25 The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.
Phi 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
(KJV)

In place of my weakness- strength!
In place of my inability- ability!
In place of my sorrow and pain- joy!
In place of my lack- provision!

Christianity has always been about the cry of the wounded for healing. We come to faith after recognition of our need, and Christ becomes all we need. But there is a different kind of recognition of our need, that leads to condemnation.

I come from a family where every kind of weakness is mocked. It’s a family where “strong” is considered the only way to be- no tears, no weakness, no inability. Anything that is has a broken leg is put down. I am only half-joking, because the world truly is like that. Part of the reason we find it such a struggle to believe in Christ is because He offers us full acceptance… which makes no sense. We are broken things, and fully aware of it- and if we are not, the world keeps reminding us of it; so how come Christ accepts us?

I work a lot with human bodies, of all shapes and sizes. When I was with a patient yesterday, she said something to me about her “big tummy”; and I laughed (as I always do, because everyone does that- especially women), and asked her (as I always do) why it is that we are so critical of ourselves. It led to a discussion of body image disorders, and the Extreme Makeover disease. The strange thing about condemnation is that although it starts out as an external thing, after not very long, most of us internalise it. And once that happens, it becomes our prison. And then, eventually, somehow, we come to God thinking that’s the way He wants us- grovelling, and disgusted with ourselves. And we don’t leave it there; we are redeemed (praise God!), but we take the burden with us- because we feel better carrying it along, thinking somehow that if we feel bad enough about ourselves, we can bully ourselves into winning a place in heaven (or into being right, or accepted, or gaining favour, or just making up for the wrong we’ve done).

Not so. Christianity differs from every major world religion in one critical thing: we don’t have to do a thing to earn our salvation. Christ died for us. That’s it. It is finished. We can’t believe it, you see; we (in our broken, sin-blinded state) imagine that there’s something we can do, to make us ok. There isn’t, though, because it’s done. Unbelievable as it may be, it’s true. And most of us have trouble appropriating that; it’s called grace, and we don’t get it.

That’s probably at the root of our self-condemnation, and by extension, why we condemn others. Of course there is much to condemn- we are, to our eyes, unfinished, and we still make mistakes. We think that somehow if we squash ourselves down, berate ourselves for messing up, we can make it better, or stop ourselves from being stupid (a word we like to use), or stop ourselves making the same mistake again. (For the record, not so). Self-condemnation breeds nothing but poor self-esteem, a very sick feeling in the middle of oneself, and, eventually, the feeling that others are condemning you too; and then, your own constant condemnation of others. It’s generational, too: if your parents condemned you, you tend to condemn yourself, and you are likely to condemn your children. It’s like a contagious disease, and is closely related to shame.

The point, however, is that Christ sets us free, makes us whole- not anything we do. That’s nothing to be ashamed of; that’s something to rejoice in! He makes us more than we ever dream; He makes us perfect in God’s sight (and who has a higher standard than that??). Christ is there when we are broken, making us whole… In our sickness, making us well… In every situation where we cause hurt to our loved ones, healing that hurt and restoring us to fellowship. In short, He fixes us where we can’t fix ourselves- whether we believe and accept it, or not. We don’t have to live condemned- by others, or by our selves. We can live free. Life is not a popularity contest, and condemnation lies to us; there is no happy prize for self-condemnation, and living to avoid the condemnation of others only earns us a world of pain.

A simple prayer: Lord, I pray for freedom from self-condemnation, and Your power to set me free from the condemnation (real, and perceived) of others. I accept and receive Your sacrifice for every mistake I have made, and for every mistake I will ever make, for all my inability and weakness, and all the ways I have hurt myself and others. I pray that I would forgive myself too, and that I would be set free, in Jesus’ name. Amen.